Every woman gets badgered at least once a week by a guy who, under different circumstances, may be nice, but can’t take a hint. There once was a time when a man would approach a woman and she could politely decline, no harm, no foul, and both parties would go their ways. Soon, a polite decline was no longer acceptable, and a woman had to give the guy a reason why. Some men act like the first no is just a warm-up. That is when a simple conversation turns into a whole production.

Women wised up and began spouting a response that left men stumped: “I have a man.” In man law, a man couldn’t disrespect the union of another man, whether he knew him or not. Once she said she was taken, it was as if the man inquiring felt for her boyfriend. You don’t disrespect a happy home. Karma is a bitch. Yet something shifted, and man law became obsolete. Now the phrase only works when the man on the other end still has some respect for boundaries.

“Excuse me Miss. I came over to tell you, I think you are beautiful.” “Why, thank you.” “I was wondering maybe we can keep in touch.” “Well, I don’t give me number out like that. I have a boyfriend.” “Oh. Well do you love him? I just want to be friends with you.” “Yes, I love him. What kind of girlfriend would I be if I made friends with random men?” “If you let me be your friend, you’d be a happy girlfriend.” Ewww! That kind of talk is exactly why women get tired of being polite.

Ladies, if you have ever had one of these conversations you know how exhausting they can be. Men, since when did it become okay to be a snake? Let me let the fellas in on a little secret: if a woman is interested she will give you her info, boyfriend or not. If you have to interrogate her for an e-mail address, you are doing too much and she’s more sympathetic than smitten. Saying “I have a man” carries no weight anymore. A safe bet is to stop acting confused and read the room the first time.